What Would You Do For A Klondike Bar?
by Anatee Apple-Hime Takaramono
Summary: When there's one Klondike bar left in the freezer, all of the campers are pretty much in a battle-to-the-death to get it? Who was the original owner of the Klondike bar? Why does everybody like Klondike bars on this island? And why is Owen freaking out?
1. WHY DOES EVERYBODY NEED THAT KLONDIKE?

**What would the Total Drama characters do when there's one Klondike bar left in the freezer?**

**Insanity.**

**Disclaimer-I own zip. Meaning nothing.**

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Courtney:

"Duncan!" Courtney roared walking towards the punk boy, who was holding the last Klondike bar from the freezer, that she saved.

THAT BASTARD!

"What is it, princess?" He smirked, opening up the wrapper. "THAT WAS MINE!" Courtney yelled. "I didn't see your name on it." Duncan stated.

WHAM!

"Fuck!" Duncan yelled, falling to his knees, protecting his now (possibly) broken private parts.

Courtney happily took the Klondike bar, that landed on his back and walked away.

* * *

Owen:

"GUYS! WHO TOOK THE LAST KLONDIKE BAR!?"

To be continued...

* * *

Scott:

"GODDAMMIT, COURTNEY!" Scott yelled running towards the CIT, who was eating the Klondike Bar.

"What is it!? You smell like dirt and sweat, which is disgusting!" Courtney growled.

"That was _my _Klondike bar!" Scott yelled.

"No it wasn't! I was saving this!" Courtney yelled, flinging the Klondike bar around to prove a point.

Scott immediately grabbed the ice cream bar and ran off.

"JACKASS!" Courtney yelled, chasing after the farm boy.

* * *

Lightning:

"SCOTT! WHY DID YOU TAKE THE SHA-LIGHTNING'S KLONDIKE BAR!?" Lightning yelled, snagging the ice cream bar from Scott.

"What!? It's mine!" Scott yelled, trying to snatch it back.

"Sha-heck no! This is the sha-Lightning's!" Lightning stated, about to take a bite.

"HA!" Courtney yelled, snatching the Klondike bar from Lightning's hand and running off.

"SHA-WHAT!? COURTNEY!?" Lighting yelled.

"GODDAMMIT!" Scott yelled, chasing after Courtney again, along with Lightning now.

* * *

**"**DUNCAN!" Owen yelled.

"What is it?" Duncan asked, still hurt from Courtney's attack.

"Did you take my Klondike bar?"

"First off, it was _mine _but, Courtney took it." Duncan explained.

"AAAAH! COME ON DUNCAN! WE NEED TO SAVE MY KLONDIKE BAR!" Owen yelled, picking up Duncan and slinging him over his shoulder, before running off.

"It was _my _Klondike bar!" Duncan growled, but, it went unheard due to Owen's motivation.

* * *

**Who's Klondike bar is it? Who knows?**

**This is going to be an ongoing story, if people actually like it. These are probably gonna be short chapters. I'm sorry. I made this at ik 8:00pm on a school night so, f**k it.**

**Read and review!**


	2. Why Zoey doesn't need a Klondike Bar

**How are we going to start this chapter? Inside of Mike's mind, of course! I'm surprised that this story is actually getting reviews. NICE REVIEWS. Wow.**

**WARNING:Strong Language and a Zoey scene, that her fans will HATE!**

**Disclaimer:I own nothing! Plus, there's gonna be some F-bombs dropped.**

* * *

Inside of Mike's mind:

"GUYS! ZOEY'S FREAKING OUT OVER A KLONDIKE BAR! HEEEEELLLLPPPP!" Mike yelled, popping into his mind.

"A KLONDIKE BAR!? OH NO!" Vito yelled...

Before punching Mike in the face.

"Whoops. I was joking." Vito smiled.

"Why would your gil' go crazy about a Klondike bar?!" Manitoba Smith asked, annoyed by the fact that Mike was being over-dramatic as fuck right now.

"Because... IT WAS THE LAST ONE!" Mike yelled. Suddenly, Mal popped in *Out of nowhere*

"ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS!? A KLONDIKE BAR!? MIKE, PROCESS OVER WHAT YOU SAID, DUMBASS!" Mal yelled in fury.

"Zoey's freaking out over ICE CREAM!? FREAKIN' ICE CREAM!?" Vito and Manitoba growled.

"Uh... Yeah." Mike said.

"THAT'S FUCKING IT! I'M TAKING OVER HIS STUPID BODY!" Mal yelled, before popping out of Mike's conscious.

"Should we beat him?" Vito asked Manitoba.

"Sure, why not?"

"WHY ME!"

* * *

Mike... Of in this case, Mal now I guess:

"OH MIKE!" Zoey wailed, into Mike's chest, staining his shirt with her petty tears as Mal popped out.

"BITCH!" He shouted, pushing Zoey into mud, that randomly appeared. "I'M GETTING THAT GODDAMN KLONDIKE BAR! SO, I CAN SEE YOU DESPAIR![1]" Mal cackled before running off...

Leaving Zoey to cry, in the mud...

Before Owen ran over her, killing her.

* * *

Zoey:

Oh wait... She's dead.

Nevermind.

* * *

Noah:

"OWEN, WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING!?" Noah yelled, as he was on top of Duncan...

Who was still on Owen's shoulder.

Suddenly, Owen's head turned around, turning 180 degrees.

"I MUST FIND MY KLONDIKE BAR." He said in a demonic voice.

"What..." Noah and Duncan never finished their statement, because...

A WILD IZZY HAS APPEARED!

Izzy used Jungle Vine!

Owen lost all of his HP!

Owen gave the winner, all of snacks in his pockets...

Owen whited out!

* * *

Owen, Duncan, and Noah found themselves back at the infirmary, because, they dared to fight the wild Izzy.

And failed miserably.[2]

* * *

**Should this fic be rated M for the language? XD**

**I don't feel sorry that I killed off Zoey.**

**I'll be surprised if her fans, managed to finish this chapter.**

**References-**

**1-Despair? Junko Enoshima anyone?**

**2-POKEMON GODDAMMIT.**

**AND IF ANYBODY SAYS ANYTHING ABOUT ZOEY-**

**I will use Owen on them. :)**

**Read and Review!**


	3. Bullshit Happens I'm dead serious

**Two Chapters? One Day? AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-**

**Disclaimer-I don't own this shit.**

* * *

Jo and Brick:

"ALRIGHT! Listen, Sir-Wets-his pants! Someone stole my Klondike Bar!" Jo yelled at Brick.

"What a coincidence! SOMEONE STOLE MY KLONDIKE BAR!" Brick yelled.

"ARE YOU ACCUSING ME!?" They both yelled at each other.

"IT'S MINE FUCKERSSSS!"Courtney yelled, running past the two, with Scott, Lightning, and Mal chasing after her.

"SCRAWNY! WHAT'S GOING ON!?" Jo yelled at Mal.

"Courtney has the last fucking Klondike Bar! PLus, Zoey died!" Mal said.

"YOU PRRRRRIIIIIICCCCKKKKKK." A voice in the wind said, but, no one gave a shit about it.

"That B.I.T.C.H. has the Klondike bar!?" Jo yelled, after Mal ran off.

"Uh.. Don't you mean Courtne-"

"YES, I FUCKING MEAN COURTNEY."

* * *

Izzy:

"IZZY! GET OUT OF THE WAY!" Courtney yelled.

"NO! THAT IS IZZY'S KLONDIKE BAR!" Izzy screamed, swinging on a vine, snatching the ice cream in her hands and went off to eat it.

Privately.

"YOU LITTLE-FUCK!" Courtney yelled, but, got tackled by Lightning and Scott.

"You dumbasses! Izzy has the Klondike bar!" Courtney growled, running off.

"ARE YOU SERIOUS!?" Soctt screamed chasing after Courtney.

Lightning just fell to his knees and screamed...

"SHA-WHHHHHYYYYYYYYY!?"

* * *

Dawn and B:

"DAWWNNN!" Owen yelled, with Noah and Duncan following him.

"Yes, what is it Owen? Your aura shows that your freaking out." Dawn asked.

"SOMEONE STOLE THE LAST KLONDIKE BAR!"

"What!? But, it was my Klondike bar!" Dawn gasped. "THOSE FUCKERS ARE-"

She was about to curse, but, she noticed that Duncan, Noah, Owen, and B just stared at her. She cleared her throat.

"I mean... I was saving the last Klondike bar for myself!" Dawn said, sadly.

B responded by, punching his fist into his palm, several times.

* * *

Ezekiel:

He just snarled at the wild animals and ran off...

* * *

Trent:

"Nine, nine, niine..." Trent hummed to himself as he opened the Mess Hall's freezer to find the ninth/last Klondike bar.

"WHERE THE FUCK IS MY KLONDIKE BAR!?" He screamed.

"THE NINE GODS WILL HATE ME!"

And he broke down.

Sobbing.

Until Chef Hatchet chased him out of the kitchen using a knife.

* * *

Harold:

"YOU IDIOTS!" Harold yelled, chasing after the group, who was chasing Izzy.

"WOULDN'T HAVE THE KLONDIKE BAR BEEN MELTED BY NOW!?"

"HAROLD, SHUT THE FUCK UP!"

* * *

Gwen:

Gwen didn't really give a shit about the Klondike bar.

She just wanted to see Courtney happy.

* * *

**2 CHAPTERS IN ONE DAY!**

**HELLA.**


	4. Bitch is the word of the day apparantly

**I'm quite frightened that this story is popular.**

**Disclaimer:I OWN NOTHING.**

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Leshawna:

"IM A BOSS ASS BITCH! BITCH! BITCH! BITCH! BITCH!" Leshawna yelled, as Heather laid on the ground in pain.

"FUCK YOU!" Heather growled.

"IZZY IS THE BOSS ASS BITCH, MOTHERFUCKER!" Izzy yelled, swinging on a vine, knocking Leshawna on the ground.

"HAHA! BITCH!" Heather cackled.

"SHUT UP!" Leshawna growled, before tackling Heather, into the mud.

"Sweet! Hot babes in mud wrestling!" Cody said happily. Sierra overheard him.

"HEY CODY! IF I WIN, WILL YOU DATE ME!?" Sierra asked.

"Yeah, sure!" Cody said, before realizing about what he done.

"NO, WAIT-"

"FOR CODDDDYYYYYYY!"

"AH, FUCK!"

"IZZY HAS THE KLONDIKE BAR! COME ON CODY!" Gwen yelled, takking Cody's arm and running.

"GWEN! YOU BITCH!" Sierra yelled, chasing after the two.

* * *

Owen, Duncan, Noah, Dakota, Dawn, B, Sam, and Anne Maria were looking for Courtney. How did Dakota, Sam, and Anne Maria join them?

WHO KNOWS!?

"Yo! So We're looking for a stupid ice cream bar!?"Anne Maria asked.

"THAT WAS SUPPOST TO BE MY ICE CREEEEAAAAAM!" Dakota turned into Dakotazoid.

FUCK!

* * *

Alejandro:

"NINE-HATER!" Trent yelled.

"AAAAAAAHHHH!"

Yeah, Alejandro was being chased by Trent.

* * *

Cameron:

"Mike! Where's the last Klondike Bar!?" Cameron asked, running towards Mal.

"I'M MAL RIGHT NOW! IZZY HAS IT!" Mal growled before running off.

"IZZY HAS IT!?" Cameron then fainted.

"QUICK! TO THE POKEMON CENTER!" Geoff shouted, as he picked up Cameron, along with Bridgette and DJ.

* * *

Justin:

He was just looking in a mirror, with Katie, Sadie, and Beth...

Staring at him.

...

I'm being serious.

* * *

Staci:

"MOVE BITCH! GET OUT OF THE WAY!" Owen yelled, plowing right past Staci and Lindsay.

Sending Lindsay flying in the air and landing safely on Tyler.

With Staci...

Dying.

* * *

Eva:

"WHERE THE FUCKING HELL IS MY KLONDIKE BAR!?"

* * *

**Oh noez! Now we're going to have 4 psychopaths on the loose for the ice cream!**

**I think I've said/mentioned all of the contestants *Just contestants***

**If I've missed any, please tell me!**

**Read and Review!**


	5. Screw this Shit I'm done

**If I wanted a Klondike bar...**

**I would shoot Sayaka Maizono.**

**Also guys, the endings coming upon us TODAY!**

**ENJOY!**

**Disclaimer-I OWN NONE OF THIS SHIT**

* * *

"WHAT!? A KLONDIKE BAR WENT MISSING!?" Justin asked Owen.

"YES!"

"I DON'T GIVE A FUCK!" Justin slapped Owen.

Suddenly, Owen grew large, sharp teeth. He quickly grabbed Justin and threw him into the water.

Where Fang ate him. And his fangirls (Katie, Sadie, and Beth) cried.

Yeah.

* * *

"ROAR!" Feral Ezekiel snarled at Courtney, Scott, Lightning, Mal, Jo, and Brick.

"AAAHH!" Brick screamed, with his pants turning darker.

"ARE FUCKING SERIOUS!?" Mal screamed at Brick...

Punching him in the face.

"GOD DAMN IT!"

Holy shit! Brick just cursed!

Too bad he met Justin's fate...

How? I don't know. I'm the author.

I can't see everything.

* * *

"Hey Owen, are you-"

"I'M FUCKING FINE."

Duncan and Noah shared a look of discomfort.

What the fuck happened to Owen?

He used to be so happy...

But, now...

HE'S PSYCHOPATH...

SEARCHING FOR A KLONDIKE BAR.

Is the author serious?

Yes. Yes, she is.

* * *

Gwen and Cody were currently hiding in a cave.

"CODY! WHERE THE FUCK IS GWEN!?" They heard Sierra's screams echo off the cave's walls, as she walked near it...

But, not inside. HA.

As soon as the cost was clear...

The two quickly ran out of there.

* * *

"Alright! IZZY GIVE ME THE FUCKING KLONDIKE!"

Courtney managed to corner Izzy.

At the top of the cliff.

"NEVER!"

Then suddenly, a snake grabbed the Klondike bar, until an Eagle grabbed the snake, and...

The shark ate the eagle.

* * *

Who's Klondike bar was it?

The world may never know.

* * *

**YES. IT'S OVER.**

**NO SEQUELS. OKAY. JUST NO.**

**How the Klondike bar died was sorta how bunny died. Remember? Dj's pet. That's all I could remember XD**

**READ AND REVIEW!**


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